This is primarily an update blog, as I am up against a couple of deadlines, one for an article and one for hunting season. Both of which have been occupying a large chunk of my time, and so I have been slack about blog writing.
I am in the full swing of things, getting ready for opening archery season. I have all kinds of new gear to field test this year, and more archery to practice. Overall though, I am feeling confident this year.
So I apologize to my readers, that I have not been able to get posted a more substantial piece yet. Trust me, they are in the works. I have pieces planned at the moment for Skadi, as well as some thoughts on things like hierarchy, leaderships, elders and that kind of thing. Honestly, I am not sure I will get around to all of them.
That is because I have been in an odd place lately. There has been several family issues, resulting in both my parents being in the hospital at pretty much the same time. Then there is the house hunting, and generally that has been going well.
But I have also been in an odd place spiritually. It is at least one part crisis, wanting to hang it all up and walk away, and one part waiting. It almost feels like the spirits are waiting for me to get to a certain place, or are waiting for me to figure out what the next step it. Either way, I have not made any kind of notable progress. I did rebuild the altar recently, and the new one is certainly an improvement.
There has been a lot of spiritual mood swings. A good deal of oscillation between “fuck this” and “what do you want from me!?!” I am feeling very lost at the moment, and have been openly questioning my current path and my philosophies. I know that doubt is normal for such things, but that doesn’t make it any easier.
I have also had to really look at my time commitments. This past year has flown by, and my time is at a premium at the moment with no sign of slowing down. I am feeling I have to free up more time where I can, so I will be looking real carefully at what I am using it for.
But at the same time, I can’t help but get the feeling that this is all for something. Vague I know, but maybe something along the lines that not all who wander are lost.
That me feeling lost in the woods is a good thing, either that I am looking for something, or walking my own path. Perhaps the spirits have things to teach me at the moment. It is really hard to say for sure.
So I am going to remain in the woods for the time being. Spiritually if not literally, as hunting season is right around the corner.
So if you need me, I will be in the woods.